Wailing Wall

RSS

I think one thing you can do to help your friends who are depressed is to reach out to them not in the spirit of helping, but in the spirit of liking them and wanting their company. “I’m here to help if you ever need me” is good to know, but hard to act on, especially when you’re in a dark place. Specific, ongoing, pleasure-based invitations are much easier to absorb. “I’m here. Let’s go to the movies. Or stay in and order takeout and watch some dumb TV.” “I’m having a party, it would be really great if you could come for a little while.” Ask them for help with things you know they are good at and like doing, so there is reciprocity and a way for them to contribute. “Will you come over Sunday and help me clear my closet of unfashionable and unflattering items? I trust your eye.” “Will you read this story I wrote and help me fix the dialogue?” “Want to make dinner together? You chop, I’ll assemble.” “I am going glasses shopping and I need another set of eyes.” Remind yourself why you like this person, and in the process, remind them that they are likable and worth your time and interest.

Talk to the parts of the person that aren’t being eaten by the depression. Make it as easy as possible to make and keep plans, if you have the emotional resources to be the initiator and to meet your friends a little more than halfway. If the person turns down a bunch of invitations in a row because (presumably) they don’t have the energy to be social, respect their autonomy by giving it a month or two and then try again. Keep the invitations simple; “Any chance we could have breakfast Saturday?” > “ARE YOU AVOIDING ME BECAUSE YOU’RE DEPRESSED OR BECAUSE YOU HATE ME I AM ONLY TRYING TO HELP YOU.” “I miss you and I want to see you” > “I’m worried about you.” A depressed person is going to have a shame spiral about how their shame is making them avoid you and how that’s giving them more shame, which is making them avoid you no matter what you do. No need for you to call attention to it. Just keep asking. “I want to see you” “Let’s do this thing.” “If you are feeling low, I understand, and I don’t want to impose on you, but I miss your face. Please come have coffee with me.” “Apology accepted. ApologIES accepted. So. Gelato and Outlander?”

-

#613: How do I reach out to my friends who have depression? | Captain Awkward

P.S. A lot of people with depression and other mental illnesses have trouble making decisions or choosing from a bunch of different options. “Wanna get dinner at that pizza place on Tuesday night?” is a LOT easier to answer than “So wanna hang out sometime? What do you want to do?”

(via startrekrenegades)

actordougjones:

DOZENS of nominations/challenges for this ALS/ Lou Gehrig’s Disease Ice Bucket Challenge have been pouring in from more people than I can keep track of, even. Without putting pressure on anyone else, I challenge anyone seeing this post to simply look outside the box we live in and donate when we can/ if we can to whatever charitable cause rests on our hearts.#ALSIceBucketChallenge #dougjones #charity #love #hope

You need to understand that I’ll never be the girl that begs you to stay. If you decide to walk out of my life, I might be sad for a little while but know that I’ll never chase you. I’ll just let you go.

- Midnight thoughts (I may love you, but i’ll never need you)

(Source: reality-escape-artist)

why are my emotions so fucked up? (help)

so yesterday was panic-attack day, today is random crying day. might as well put it to good use…

If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also

-

Matt 5:39

This specifically refers to a hand striking the side of a person’s face, tells quite a different story when placed in it’s proper historical context. In Jesus’s time, striking someone of a lower class ( a servant) with the back of the hand was used to assert authority and dominance. If the persecuted person “turned the other cheek,” the discipliner was faced with a dilemma. The left hand was used for unclean purposes, so a back-hand strike on the opposite cheek would not be performed. Another alternative would be a slap with the open hand as a challenge or to punch the person, but this was seen as a statement of equality. Thus, by turning the other cheek the persecuted was in effect putting an end to the behavior or if the slapping continued the person would lawfully be deemed equal and have to be released as a servant/slave.   

(via thefullnessofthefaith)

THAT makes a lot more sense, now, thank you. 

(via guardianrock)

I can attest to the original poster’s comments. A few years back I took an intensive seminar on faith-based progressive activism, and we spent an entire unit discussing how many of Jesus’ instructions and stories were performative protests designed to shed light on and ridicule the oppressions of that time period as a way to emphasize the absurdity of the social hierarchy and give people the will and motivation to make changes for a more free and equal society.

For example, the next verse (Matthew 5:40) states “And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.” In that time period, men traditionally wore a shirt and a coat-like garment as their daily wear. To sue someone for their shirt was to put them in their place - suing was generally only performed to take care of outstanding debts, and to be sued for one’s shirt meant that the person was so destitute the only valuable thing they could repay with was their own clothing. However, many cultures at that time (including Hebrew peoples) had prohibitions bordering on taboo against public nudity, so for a sued man to surrender both his shirt and his coat was to turn the system on its head and symbolically state, in a very public forum, that “I have no money with which to repay this person, but they are so insistent on taking advantage of my poverty that I am leaving this hearing buck-ass naked. His greed is the cause of a shameful public spectacle.”

All of a sudden an action of power (suing someone for their shirt) becomes a powerful symbol of subversion and mockery, as the suing patron either accepts the coat (and therefore full responsibility as the cause of the other man’s shameful display) or desperately chases the protester around trying to return his clothes to him, making a fool of himself in front of his peers and the entire gathered community.

Additionally, the next verse (Matthew 5:41; “If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles.”) was a big middle finger to the Romans who had taken over Judea and were not seen as legitimate authority by the majority of the population there. Roman law stated that a centurion on the march could require a Jew (and possibly other civilians as well, although I don’t remember explicitly) to carry his pack at any time and for any reason for one mile along the road (and because of the importance of the Roman highway system in maintaining rule over the expansive empire, the roads tended to be very well ordered and marked), however hecould not require any service beyond the next mile marker. For a Jewish civilian to carry a centurion’s pack for an entire second mile was a way to subvert the authority of the occupying forces. If the civilian wouldn’t give the pack back at the end of the first mile, the centurion would either have to forcibly take it back or report the civilian to his commanding officer (both of which would result in discipline being taken against the soldier for breaking Roman law) or wait until the civilian volunteered to return the pack, giving the Judean native implicit power over the occupying Roman and completely subverting the power structure of the Empire. Can you imagine how demoralizing that must have been for the highly ordered Roman armies that patrolled the region?

Jesus was a pacifist, but his teachings were in no way passive. There’s a reason he was practically considered a terrorist by the reigning powers, and it wasn’t because he healed the sick and fed the hungry.

(via central-avenue)

Though I ended up deciding Christianity wasn’t for me, I went to my parents’ church with them because the sermons were more like academic lectures on the contexts of the scriptures. Without knowing the context, reading any religious text accurately would be very difficult.

(via heroprincesslucina)

reidavidson:

So here is the story.  I ran a crowdsource fund to move a friend and their two kids out of an abusive home to come live with me. Thanks to the MASSIVE generosity of Tumblr, we were able to accomplish this goal and Mom and babies are safe with me.
Unfortunately, we still need help. I live in a tiny 2 bedroom apartment with two cats, a large dog, two kids and another adult.  Mom and the kids all have to share one bed currently.  I’m free to leave the lease I’m in at any time but saving up on one paycheck covering four people is hard.
I have managed to scrape together $900 towards moving but according to my calculations, we’re going to need anywhere from $1500 to $3000 to move. To top everything else off, we’re not able to sign up for food stamps (which we sorely need) or reduced day care (which we REALLY REALLY need) until we have a place where Mom is on the lease and where we are currently wouldn’t agree to add them.
Mom just got a new job and once we get moved into a new place, we’ll be able to cover all expenses without much issue but the cost of the initial move needs to be obtained quickly so we can sign up for sorely needed benefits.
To raise money, I’m going to attempt to do as many commissions between now and September 1st as I possibly can creatively and emotionally handle.  Which means you will be getting awesome commissions as fast as I can churn them out which means little to no waiting.
Here is what I’m offering:





(Color option 2  and full body options not offered due to time constraints.  Prices are applied PER CHARACTER)
Send all commission requests to maggie.amber.davidson@gmail.com and I’ll be here all day on the weekends working and after 6PM on the weekdays to help you and discuss the wills and won’ts of your requests. 
If you’d like to help but don’t want a commission, you can donate to me here.  I don’t expect donations but would certainly appreciate any help we can get!
If you have nothing to spare (believe me, I understand) please just signal boost!

reidavidson:

So here is the story.  I ran a crowdsource fund to move a friend and their two kids out of an abusive home to come live with me. Thanks to the MASSIVE generosity of Tumblr, we were able to accomplish this goal and Mom and babies are safe with me.

Unfortunately, we still need help. I live in a tiny 2 bedroom apartment with two cats, a large dog, two kids and another adult.  Mom and the kids all have to share one bed currently.  I’m free to leave the lease I’m in at any time but saving up on one paycheck covering four people is hard.

I have managed to scrape together $900 towards moving but according to my calculations, we’re going to need anywhere from $1500 to $3000 to move. To top everything else off, we’re not able to sign up for food stamps (which we sorely need) or reduced day care (which we REALLY REALLY need) until we have a place where Mom is on the lease and where we are currently wouldn’t agree to add them.

Mom just got a new job and once we get moved into a new place, we’ll be able to cover all expenses without much issue but the cost of the initial move needs to be obtained quickly so we can sign up for sorely needed benefits.

To raise money, I’m going to attempt to do as many commissions between now and September 1st as I possibly can creatively and emotionally handle.  Which means you will be getting awesome commissions as fast as I can churn them out which means little to no waiting.

Here is what I’m offering:

image

image

image

image

image

(Color option 2  and full body options not offered due to time constraints.  Prices are applied PER CHARACTER)

Send all commission requests to maggie.amber.davidson@gmail.com and I’ll be here all day on the weekends working and after 6PM on the weekdays to help you and discuss the wills and won’ts of your requests. 

If you’d like to help but don’t want a commission, you can donate to me here.  I don’t expect donations but would certainly appreciate any help we can get!

If you have nothing to spare (believe me, I understand) please just signal boost!

analyticisms:

Debunking the myth that Tumblr is only used and populated by kids.
unwrapping:

Age Ranges of Tumblr’s Global Audience:Tumblr sees about 150 million global unique visitors monthly. comScore, an Internet analytics firm, averaged Tumblr’s age ranges over the first quarter of 2014 for both Dashboard and blog network traffic worldwide:
Ages 13 to 17: 15%
Ages 18 to 34: 41%
Ages 35 to 54: 29%
Ages 55 and up: 15%
"People are often really surprised to note that we have the same percentage of 55-plus-year-olds as we do 13-to-17-year-olds," said Danielle Strle (strle), Tumblr’s director of product for community and content, in an NPR webinar. “But over half of our audience is solidly in the 13-to-34 demographic.”

analyticisms:

Debunking the myth that Tumblr is only used and populated by kids.

unwrapping:

Age Ranges of Tumblr’s Global Audience:
Tumblr sees about 150 million global unique visitors monthly. comScore, an Internet analytics firm, averaged Tumblr’s age ranges over the first quarter of 2014 for both Dashboard and blog network traffic worldwide:

  • Ages 13 to 17: 15%
  • Ages 18 to 34: 41%
  • Ages 35 to 54: 29%
  • Ages 55 and up: 15%

"People are often really surprised to note that we have the same percentage of 55-plus-year-olds as we do 13-to-17-year-olds," said Danielle Strle (strle), Tumblr’s director of product for community and content, in an NPR webinar. “But over half of our audience is solidly in the 13-to-34 demographic.”

I’ve always wanted not to give a fuck. While crying helplessly into my pillow for no good reason, I would often fantasize that maybe someday I could be one of those stoic badasses whose emotions are mostly comprised of rock music and not being afraid of things.

- Allie Brosh, Hyperbole and a Half (via quoted-books)

Now it’s your turn to say something sympathetic.

I’m really glad I don’t have kids.

(Source: zipitclark)

thegirlwithgoldeyes:

thegirlwithgoldeyes:

She had curves in all the wrong places. She had a boob sticking out of her kneecap and I’d never seen an ass on the back of someone’s head before

She had legs that went on forever. And ever, and ever. Legs going on into the endless primordial void from which we all came from and to which we shall all return. Her toes touched infinity, her hips perched on the cessation of existence.

she had rivers of dark brown hair falling down her shoulders. it had taken over her entire skull. it grew thick from her ears and nose. it overwhelmed her eye sockets and sprouted from her mouth.

nannasghost:

YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE A FUN ART MEME???

pick a drawing your friend did, and redraw it in your style, and then friend pictures a drawing you did, and redraws it in theirs! i bet that would be fun

(Source: blingeed)

sleepy-socialist:

vivelamours:

The Black Power Mixtape 1967-1975 (2011), Göran Hugo Olsson

You heard it right folks, the FBI considered free breakfasts for poor children to be the most dangerous internal threat to the country. Literally the kind of thing Jesus would do was the most dangerous threat to the country.

kingcheddarxvii:

Take any movie premise about a white man and make it about a grandma and it becomes twice as interesting

lilacblossoms:

fieldbears:

istudypirates:

claudiaboleyn:

burntlikethesun:

loremipsumfandom:

fauxkaren:

quantumblog:

trying-to-resonate-concrete:

Dear STFU-Moffat and associates,

From now on, I insist you describe Steven Moffat as “Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat.” Just to make sure you’re being fair.

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat is a queerbaiting hack

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat’s writing features sexism and overly complicated plots that don’t really make any sense.

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat has characters needlessly tell the viewer information that he should be showing them.

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat is incapable of creating real emotional stakes in his stories.

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat calls teenage mother a ‘slut’ in DVD commentary

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat says bisexuals are too busy having sex to watch television, and therefore don’t need representing.

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat thinks asexuals are too boring to write about. 

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat thinks the only important people in London are white people and enjoys racist, sexist tropes.

*sips tea*

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat writes stories that are less progressive than when the show debuted 50 years ago

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat enjoys harmful homophobic tropes

Emmy-award winning writer Steven Moffat makes lesbian character fall in love with special snowflake man

k-lionheart:

renmorris:

Wtnv + trees

Say! What kind of fantastic trees have you got growing around here?

The livestock one made me question and rethink
everything

(Source: i-would-hail-it)